Avoid Unparallel Construction

“Unparallel Construction” is the bane of commercial copy.

Sentences, and sometimes whole paragraphs of copy, lose their direction and fail to communicate their core message if they are composed with unparallel components.

Here is a current example.

As I was driving this morning I heard the following radio commercial:

First sound clip -- a pizza shop, taking orders over the phone. The customer keeps adding ingredients to his order… “pepperoni, extra cheese, anchovies, onions, mushrooms, …”

A lively sound clip with good actors. Pleasant to listen to.

Second clip – we switch to the anchor, who explains to us that there are TWO types of people in the world: those who order pizzas loaded up with multiple toppings like the customer we’ve just heard, and… those who would not put a slice of pizza into their mouths no matter what.

So far so good. We clearly understand the initial set up. TWO types of people – the pizza lovers versus pizza haters.

Okay. We are already wondering if this is some sort of pizza commercial…

But then comes the Grand Disconnect, thanks to the obviously faulty and unparallel construction of the whole copy.

We are next told that, SIMILARLY (?), there are also TWO types of HEARTBURN! And such-and-such brand of over-the-counter anti-acid medication takes care even the worst of them!

Hello?! “Two types”?

WHAT two types of heartburn? Since the whole analogy is based on the conceptual parallel established with the previous dichotomy (pizza lover vs. pizza haters) the intended parallelism breaks down.

Yes, people who order their pizzas with massive toppings may and do get a heartburn. We know that.

But why should the other group have heartburn as well if they are not eating pizza at all? It just doesn’t make any sense.

Those two dichotomies are not parallel at all since the former cannot cause the latter.

That’s why this commercial confuses the listeners rather than make an easy and obvious point.

All throughout the commercial I found myself wondering why people who avoid pizza at all cost do get a heartburn JUST LIKE (?) the hard-core pizza lovers.

The first set-up intro of the commercial is totally wasted.

Instead, the commercial could again start with that great opening sound clip of a worker taking a pizza order with mega toppings, but then would immediately switch to the PROBLEM created by that order: a massive heartburn.

SOLUTION? Our wonderful anti-acid medication of course. Okay, it's a bit boring. There is no great punch line there, I admit. But at least it makes sense and does not confuse the listener.

By setting up this Rubic Cube of unparallel dichotomies, the commercial really bites more than it can chew and listeners are the ones who get a heartburn while listening to it and trying to decipher the enigma thrown at them.

It’s great for exercising your brain while driving on the road. But probably it’s not very good for selling a whole lot of anti-acid pills.

A Personal Milestone: 400th EZ Article in 365 Days

Today I've published my 400th online article on www.ezinearticles.com

I initially did not realize that it has taken me exactly one year to date to write these 400 articles.

However, I must note that there were many months within the last year when I did not contribute any articles to EZ at all due to other pressing (and paying) writing assignments. So had I written regularly, I probably could've been up to perhaps 700 articles by now.

I am thinking to write a brochure on how to market goods and services through article writing. It certainly did me good, so good that recently I started writing for another similar ezine article web site as well -- The American Chronicle.

Here are my EZ and Chronicle links:

Ezine Articles

American Chronicle

QR Code Revolution is on its way

A sample QR Code

Barcode, move aside! QR CODE is here.

Soon we will be pushing flash movies, coupons, MP3 files, good-old text and god knows what else to our cell phones by pointing their tiny built-in cameras to a QR Code, taking a snapshot, and then pressing the SEND button.

The revolution is already well underway in Japan and it's just a matter of time before it reaches the American shores.

Imagine, you are at the supermarket. You see an odd looking bottle of something on the shelf with a QR Code on it.

You point your cell phone camera at it, take a snapshot and push SEND and presto!

Soon you are watching a video about how to use the product, its benefits, complete with a 15% discount coupon that you can use right there at the same store!

Welcome to the 21st century and make all your marketing plans accordingly.

Click here for an excellent article on QR Codes

"People's Princess" and the Power of Words

As I was watching the movie QUEEN yesterday (for which the lovely Helen Mirren has won an Oscar this year), I was once again reminded the power of words and how the right phrase coined at the right moment in history can sway the masses in one direction or the other.

After Princess Diana dies unexpectedly in that car crash in Paris, PM Tony Blair's chief aide and writer comes up with the phrase "People's Princess" for him to use during his public condolence speech.

The phrase, pure invention of a gifted writer, catches on like wildfire. It captures and expresses the British public's love and adoration for the fallen Diana so well that in the end even a reluctant Queen has to come down from her high horse and pay due respect to the memory of her former and still-resented daughter in law.

An 11,158 Word Sales Letter

Most of the time my clients think an online marketing copy should be as short as possible in this day and age of short attention spans.

But, believe it or not, that goes against the practice of some of the most successful online marketers today.

Why?

When a targeted group of potential buyers are about to make a decision to purchase a very expensive product or service, they do not mind to read as many supporting arguments and as long a list of benefits as possible. The logic of "short is better" simply stops there.

In a previous posting I have mentioned a financial newsletter subscription letter distributed by Agora Publishing that was over 7,000 words.

Today I have received a well-crafted sales copy from American Writers and Artists Institute, promoting a 3-Day $9,000 seminar that was over 11,000 words!

There is a lesson there for all copywriters and direct marketers.

“Link Popularity” versus “Search Engine Saturation” Indexes

“Link Popularity” (LP) and “Search Engine Saturation” (SES) indexes are two different and complementary ways of measuring your web site’s ranking and relative importance on the web.

LP indicates the number of web sites with links to your domain.

SES, on the other hand, indicates the number of pages on your web site indexed by various search engine robots.

In general, the higher these numbers are the better it is.

However, there are caveats as in everything else in life.

High LP numbers, for example, can be generated by links coming in from web sites that nobody is visiting anyhow. All links are not created equal. A link from yahoo.com is perhaps worth a million links from nobodyvisitsme.com (just an example).

In the infancy of the Internet, “Directory Farms” were created to drive up the LP numbers. These were web sites with nothing in them but a bunch of web links. But these days you will be penalized by most search engines if your link is included in such “farms.” So you have to be as concerned about the quality of your links as their quantity.

SES has its own issues too. You can create thousands of pages, for example, to generate a higher SES index but…

Are those new pages related to the main topic of your web site?

And do they make it easier or more confusing to navigate around your web site? When visitors get confused by your inconsistent navigation and unrelated content, they may leave forever.

There is a point where “abundance” tips over into “confusion” and to know when to add things and when to stop is at the heart of search engine “optimization” process.

(If more was simply better under ANY conditions, the process would be called “Search Engine Maximization” and not “Optimization.”)

There are many sites out there that generate both LP and SES reports; some even provide comparative data on competing web sites. One such site that I use and like is www.marketleap.com.

Check the LP and SES numbers of your web site regularly since they change frequently. The best practice is to take regular measurements and then take their average for a reliable benchmark.

If the numbers are good, try to understand what you did right and replicate it.

If, on the other hand, the numbers are falling, analyze the reasons why and take appropriate measures to counter the trend.

About "Knowing"...

“It’s not what you know, it’s not who you know, it’s who knows what you know.”

~ Ed Sykes. Motivational Coach and Speaker

Karan Bilimora - An Indian Succes Story

Karan Bilimora is a name not well known in USA but he is the owner of Cobra Beer, a company worth 100 million pounds and named as one of the 100 fastest growing companies in the UK.

"The initial years were full of struggle," he says. "But I have made it, despite a number of factors that went against me when I started. The worst recession since World War II was on, and I was obviously a foreigner trying my hand when I had never even sold a beer bottle earlier."

Click here for the rest of this story

6 Success Secrets of NFL Great Jerry Rice

Jerry Rice gew up in Crawford, Mississippi and he worked as a brick layer when he was a teenager to help his father build house foundations. Brick laying was tough work but it also helped him develop his legendary work discipline and hand strength.

He later went on to become the most successful NFL All-Pro wide receiver of all time with the San Francisco 49ers.

The following are the six success secrets that Jerry Rice used that can easily motivate you to achieve success in any aspect of your business, career, and life...

Click here for the list

Top 10 Success Tips for Interns

From Penny Loretto,
Your Guide to Internships.

Organizations seek interns who are motivated and exhibit a "go-getter" attitude. Employers also want people within their company who have a strong work ethic and are dependable and work well independently and in a team environment. Many Human Resource Departments report that they seek many of their full-time employees from interns exhibiting these skills who have previously interned with their organizations.

Click here for rest of the article