Tomboy -- UBUNTU's Great Note Pad

UBUNTU (the great-looking and totally free Linux operating system for your computer http://www.ubuntu.com/) comes with a very useful built-in notebook utility called TOMBOY. It is under Applications > Accessories.

TOMBOY is simple enough to use it over and over again for all kinds of quick notes and brainstorming. But it is also smart enough to LINK all your notes to one another, keep a good list of them, allow you to search through them, and even format them in enough ways to do the job.

For example, I have just created a series of notes about the E-books I'm planning to write within the next 6 months. So I have created a note for the general list (lower bottom in the screenshot) as well as separate notes for each e-book (see the one for Article Marketing on top-right).

Currently these notes include only a rough outline of the things I'd like to cover eventually. For example, if I need to go interview someone or read a book on a certain topic, I can create separate notes for them as well and LINK them to which ever spot I want.

UBUNTU made Tomboy links so easy. You just SELECT the text you want and then press Ctrl+L -- bingo! You have a NEW note not only titled as such but also automatically linked to your selected text in the ORIGINAL note.

What's more, when you change the TITLE of your note, the TEXT in the ORIGINAL note which is linked to this one also changes to preserve the paths. This way you do not need to worry about those pesky broken links when you change the titles of your notes. Good thinking!

UBUNTU... an amazing and very user-friendly free solution for all creatives around the world.

USPS: "Is The Correct English On Their Sign?"

I stopped by at the U.S. Post Office this morning and saw this big sign on the wall:

"Metered Mail Customers: IS THE CORRECT DATE ON YOUR METERED MAIL?"

This sentence would've been grammatically correct only if someone was asking if the "correct date" actually read "ON YOUR METERED MAIL".

An analogous sentence would be "Is the apple green?", or "Is the world round?"

I guess someone was trying to say:

1) "Metered Mail Customers: DO YOU HAVE THE CORRECT DATE ON YOUR METERED MAIL?"

or

2) "Metered Mail Customers: IS THE DATE ON YOUR METERED MAIL CORRECT?"

or

3) "Metered Mail Customers: DOES YOUR METERED MAIL HAVE THE CORRECT DATE?"

How did they find the only sentence combination that was not correct and display it prominently where everyone can see it?

I guess you need a governmental committee to achieve a feat like that.

Misplaced Modifier – Even WSJ Falls For It

“Misplaced modifier” is a frequently committed logical error that even the most prominent publications fall for occasionally. Here is an example:

“Ports are especially vulnerable to pesky animals like rabbits and deer because they offer large, fenced-in areas of dirt and grass.” (Wall Street Journal, June 21, 2007)

The sentence is malformed because it suggests that “pesky animals… offer large, fenced-in areas of dirt and grass” -- which of course is not true.

That unintended implication is created because the modifier clause “because they offer large, fenced-in areas of dirt and grass” is placed right after “pesky animals like rabbits and deer” instead of the “ports,” the true subject that needs the modification.

Solution?

Move the modifier clause right next to the subject of the sentence:

“Since they offer large, fenced-in areas of dirt and grass, ports are especially vulnerable to pesky animals like rabbits and deer.”

Or

“Ports that offer large, fenced-in areas of dirt and grass are especially vulnerable to pesky animals like rabbits and deer.”

Both would work. Case closed. Confusion prevented.

Google Page Creator - “Small Design Stuff” Leads to Frustration

Google has a not-so-bad web site design and hosting service called Google Page Creator. And it's FREE!

I've been using this free service since April 2006 for my own web site www.writer111.com

That is of course not its original URL but I have directed my own domain name to point at http://writer111.googlepages.com/ which is the real URL.

For web sites that do not need frequent updating this service is just great.

But it has one small design flaw that I'm surprised Google's really smart engineers and design team still have not discovered it.

When you are in Gmail, there is no easy way to get back to your Google Page Creator.

Almost every Google service imaginable is one easy click away from Gmail EXCEPT the “Pages” and I have no idea why.

For example, when you are looking at your Gmail main page, you see both a number of links up on the top of your page and also additional links on your drop down list under “more”.

But NONE of those links include “Pages”.

So how do you get to your web site design module if you are in Gmail?

First, you navigate BACK to www.google.com (by clicking the WEB link on top) while you are still signed in to your Gmail account, which then takes you to your main standard Google page.

There, you will notice the all-important MY ACCOUNT link on upper right.

When you click on MY ACCOUNT, that's where you will see the PAGE CREATOR link listed and NOWHERE ELSE.

Click that and voila! you'll be in your web site design module.

Why Google cannot include the PAGE CREATOR link either in the Gmail page top links or inside the “more” drop-down list is a mystery. But the first time you try to go from Gmail to “Page Creator” you will discover what a navigational feat it is. And the more you take that annoying detour, the more you realize how such very simple design flaws end up creating a totally frustrating user experience.

Small things... take care of the “small stuff” and the “larger stuff” will automatically take care of itself.

Know Thyself, and while you are at it...

"If you know yourself and your enemy, you will not fear battle.

"If you know yourself but not your enemy, you will lose a battle for every one that you win.

"If you do not know yourself and do not know your enemy, you will never see victory."

~ Sun Tzu, The Art of War

Watch Out for That Pen Name

Pen names are a long-honored tradition in Western literature. Sydney Porter wrote under the pen name “O. Henry.” Samuel Langhorne Clemens became famous as “Mark Twain.”

But you have to watch out these days if you are writing under a pseudonym. Especially if Hollywood is interested in your work.

Exhibit A -- A writer named "JT Leroy" catapults to stardom in 2000 with his explosive autobiography “Sarah,” the story of a kid growing up as the son of a West Virginia hooker turning tricks in truck stops.

It gets better – Soon JT Leroy is writing for the New York Times and Vanity Fair and calling the likes of Winona Ryder an Madonna his “friends.”

And better – In 2003, Antidote International Films Inc. (which produced movies like “Laurel Canyon” and “Thirteen”) options “Sarah” for $15,000 with the intention of turning it into a movie. The option is renewed next year for the same amount.

Then, the sky caves in – New York Times discloses that “JT Leroy” is nothing more than a pen name for Laura Albert, a mother and a little-known young novelist from Brooklyn Heights.

Result – Antidote wants all its money back since they made a contract with “JT Leroy” but Leroy does not exist.

Big mess. The case is still in court.

UPDATE (6/23/07)

Jury: novel bought by company fraudulent

By AMY WESTFELDT, Associated Press WriterSat Jun 23, 4:57 AM ET

To writer Laura Albert, her alter ego was a psychological necessity, but to jurors, the fictitious male prostitute JT LeRoy was a fraud. A Manhattan jury decided Friday that Albert had defrauded a production company that bought the movie rights to an autobiographical novel marketed as being based on LeRoy's life.

The federal jury, after a short deliberation, awarded $116,500 to Antidote International Films Inc.

The Art of Great Headlines

Writing great headlines is a true art. Some people I suspect are born with the knack of whipping up drop-dead perfect headlines at the drop of a hat. But then, to some extent, writing good headlines can be taught and learned as well.

Here is one time-tested venerable principle: make sure that your verb is somehow organically related to the core character, the main characteristics of the subject of the sentence, but it should be used in a DIFFERENT context.

Take for example this great headline by the New York Times (June 13, 2007):

"Casinos Go All In To Draw Asians" ... Perfect!

"Going all in" is a poker term and represents a situation in which a player risks everything. The writer could have said "Casinos Pull All Stops To Draw Asians"... or "Casinos Risk It All To Draw Asians" but it would not be the same. It would not have the same punch and the same juice.

Here the action phrase "going all in" is perfectly related to the "casinos." It is also used not in its traditional context of poker but in a new context of marketing. That unexpected cognitive shift injects power to the expression while still closely keeping our attention riveted to the gambling framework.

Contrast this power headline with a very weak one used by the Wall Street Journal again (by sheer coincidence?) to open a gambling story in its June 13, 2007 issue:

"What Happens in Vegas, Goes to China" (hello?)

We of course know where this headline is coming from -- it's a cutesy word play on the Vegas marketing slogan "What Happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas."

But to be aware of this "trick" is not enough to understand what the story is really about. What does it mean something "Going to China"? What is it that goes to China? It is not immediately clear.

For example, this lazy echo of a well-known slogan justifies us to wonder if "extramarital affairs" started in Vegas end up "in China" somehow? It misdirects our attention.

Then we read the accompanying subheader: "$2.2 Billion Casino Resort Is Part of New Push in Cotai To Lure Gamblers, Travelers"

O-kay... now we see what the header was talking about.

But if a header needs a subheader to be understood, then it is failing in its primary function of immediately communicating the core summary of the news story. Otherwise why open a story with a header at all?

More on this topic later on, with more practical tips for writing great headlines...

Screenwriting – Write Your Movie Backwards

Did you know that Dave Chase, the genius behind The Sopranos series, has visualized that shocking very last scene [screen going black for 10 seconds] a full three years ago? He carried that ending with him for three years. He must have realized the power of configuring his ending well in advance to settle the issue three years in advance.

Many successful movies would not add up to anything without their strong endings. Every scene is shaded and nuanced by the ending in one way or the other. As an art form with its own limitations, screenplays really are anchored by their last scenes.

Imagine, for example, the “Sixth Sense.” And think about its unexpected ending. Could any of the earlier scenes make any sense if the ending was different? Of course not.

Here is the “Ugur Akinci Method” (ahem!) of writing a screenplay without too much pain (“some pain” is unavoidable of course):

Here is the "Ugur Akinci Method" (ahem!) for writing a screenplay without too much pain ("some pain" is unavoidable of course):

1. First decide on what your ENDING will be.

2. Think your way backwards, all the way to the beginning of your script. Try to see the whole movie playing from beginning to the end in that little movie screen on the inside of your forehead.

3. Chop your story into 18 to 25 sequences.

4. Divide each sequence into 3 to 5 scenes.

5. Sit down and write the whole thing as quickly as possible from start to finish, without stopping for any reflection or self-criticism. The minute you stop and start "thinking" about it you will freeze forever and never get done.

6. Once you finish your 100 to 120 pages, you can re-write, edit and polish to your heart's content. Writing is rewriting. But "writing" -- and not the "rewriting" -- comes first.

Importance of Designing Simple Things Well

Good design is invisible. It works beautifully, seamlessly, does the job without a whimper.

Bad design, on the other hand, is everywhere! It sticks out like a pair of brown shoes under a black tux. It is in-your-face obvious.

The PT Cruiser that I have rented for the week made me realize once again how our daily lives get complicated for no other reason than bad design.

First, the window power buttons. Everyone who gets into a PT Cruiser searches for the window buttons in vain. Why? Because the designers of PT decided it would be a really “cute” idea to place all four window controls on the center of the dashboard!

So when you approach a gate toll and when you need to roll down your window in a hurry, don't panic. Just think about all the time and energy that went into an “innovation” that neither works nor is needed, and have some compassion.

Second, if you need to pop open your trunk lid from inside for easy loading and unloading of your grocery bags, forget about it. There is no pop-up button like you would have in 90% of all cars these days, that little and very useful button somewhere in the lower left side of the steering wheel.

You need to get down and insert your key into the trunk lock and open it manually every time you need to open your trunk. How's THAT for convenience?

And thirdly, watch out for the key itself because the PT designers placed the PANIC button right on the key, exactly where you would be grabbing it to unlock your doors and your trunk.

The result? On various occasions throughout the day you activate your car alarm without intending to. And if that is happening inside the tight space of an underground garage, the effect is all the more embarrassing and ear-splitting of course.

As American car manufacturers are wondering why Japanese and South Korean car makers are taking over the American market they should really pay attention to all these small things that either don't work or work with unpleasant results.

It's time they realize that “cute” is not always “friendly.”

Perhaps by taking such “design risks and challenges” they are trying to take a road less traveled and discover some new “aesthetic ground.”

Yet they should also remember what Jerry Seinfeld said about the matter: “Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.”

FREE Copy for Non-Profits in Need

Good morning folks! This morning I woke up with a great inspiration.

If you are a 501(c)3 tax-exempt non-profit organization in need of non-commercial copy for a good charitable cause, yet you are in no position to pay the $75 to $200 hourly fees that most professional copy writers like myself regularly charge, then don't despair.

I've decided to donate each month a certain portion of my time to one such qualified organization on a first-come first-served basis. This would be my own small way of giving back to the world what I received so generously from it -- this precious gift of language and creative expression.

There is no gimmick, no fine-print, no nothing to this offer. It is exactly what it reads like.

If you are one such organization please write to me at writer111[REMOVE this first to prevent spam]@gmail.com and explain your situation and your need. If I think you qualify for my free copywriting offer, I would be happy and honored to be in your service, time permitting.

My thanks in advance for helping us make this world a better place to live, one correctly-chosen word and one well-turned phrase at a time.

A Manual for $20,000

Sometimes it's not easy to price a technical writer's work. How much is a user's manual "worth", really?

It probably is not worth much if it is one of those thick door-stoppers gathering dust at the top shelf of a never-used library.

However, it might also be worth billions if it shows a technician at a nuclear plant how to stop a core meltdown in progress.

Here is a rather well-priced manual that I've read quoted in the Wall Street Journal (June 7, 2007).

Natasha Pearl runs a New York lifestyle-management service. Among her services is finding top-quality kitchen personnel for her wealthy clients.

Ms. Pearl reportedly charges $10,000 "to find a chef" "and up to $20,000 to draw up a housekeeping procedural manual for a mansion."

As Sinatra says in one of his immortal songs, "nice job if you can get it..."

Good Copy Illuminates and Delivers (the Truth)

Good copy has two important functions.

1) It brings up "the world" alive. And once our attention is engaged,

2) It also delivers the unvarnished truth.

Delivering the truth without aesthetics, without illumination, would be like that proverbial tree falling down in the forest and nobody noticing it. Does a tree really fall if there are no witnesses? We don't know.

Sheer aesthetic fireworks, on the other hand, without any truth, is disservice to the world. It is betrayal of our short existence here on this earth. It's the lowliest of the black-arts.

There should have been an Eleventh Commandment: "Thou Shalt Not Mesmerize For the Sake of Self-Aggrandizement." Eventually all good writers come to learn appreciate the "Eleventh Commandment."

Here is an author that I discovered today; a writer who has a full grasp of both of these important prose rules and boy, can she write!

She is Manohla Dargis of the New York Times and she is writing "only" movie reviews. But they are complete. Perfect. Because what she writes is both beautiful and true.

Here is the beauty part:

"Played by a tamped-down, amused and amusing Al Pacino, Willy Bank is a pint-size Trump in oversize eyeglasses and a burnt-orange tan that makes him look like an Hermès handbag..."

With a description that visual and strong, you can immediately see this character right before your very own eyes. That's power copy.

But that's not all. Dargis continues:

"But that’s how everything rolls in Mr. Soderbergh’s Vegas: smoothly and sleekly and low to the ground, without obvious effort and, most important, without ugliness... When Danny Ocean and his Boy Friday, Rusty Ryan (Mr. Pitt), stroll across a casino floor, you never see the cigarette burns on the carpeting or the middle-aged men quietly weeping after the night and their savings are long gone."

Wow! That's Sociology of Vegas 101 in a few sentences.

Writing well does not need to sacrifice from the truth. Or, inversely, writing the truth need not be an exercise in eating broken glass. Manohla Dargis is one of the many excellent writers out there today proving the point.

Two Inspiring Success Stories

Did You Know That...?

John Paul DeJoria, Co-Founder and CEO of "John Paul Mitchell Systems" which sells $800 million worth of hair products a year, was not always rich. "I was homeless twice in my life, mainly because I was too proud to ask anybody for help. In my early twenties I was divorced from my first wife. I had my son; I had no place to live. I went out and collected Coke bottles at night. I'd cash them in at the drugstore. You'd only get two or three cents in those days. We lived off a very skimpy diet in those days, rice, potatoes, cereal, macaroni and cheese or canned soup, but we lived."

Bill France, Jr., the man who single-handedly invented NASCAR stock car racing and helped build the Daytona race track, used to sweep the floors in his youth to make ends meet. When Daytona International Speedtrack was built in the late 1950s, France helped grade the earth, erect the stands, and even cleaned the port-a-johns on the construction site. When France passed away as a multi-millionaire on June 4, 2007 he left behind not only a legacy of sports but one of perseverance and success as well.

Marketing Notes: "Qode" and Onion's Sharp Take on MySpace

This morning a reader of mine made me aware that QR Code technology indeed exists in the United States, provided by Qode, a Florida company (www.qode.com). Thanks Ken D. for the heads up.

You can download the Qode software to your cell phone and then point it to the "Qode" (a version of QR Code) and it will take you to the related web site. I guess these must be proprietary QR codes because you would not want any cell phone to point and get to the same web site, or would you? I'm still not sure who and how money is made through this technology. What is the business model? Probably that's also changing and evolving as well as we speak.

You can point your cell phone at a Qode and take a virtual tour of a house on sale, compare ticket prices, get all kinds of info on all kinds of products and services, etc. And the information can be customized by times zone and other variables as well. For example, pointing the phone at a Qode "stamp" at 9 a.m. in San Francisco would take you to a web page appropriate for the "morning zone" but the same stamp will take you to an "afternoon" page in New York.

SECOND ITEM:

The Onion, the nation's premiere satire paper, has published an item on May 31 that made me laugh out loud because it expressed my own cynicism about MySpace's claim as a "social space." How can people who do not even know one another claim to be one another's friends, by the thousands at a time? That I could never comprehend. And The onion slashed at the whole idea with the following new story:

"MySpace Outage Leaves Millions Friendless"!!! I really laughed hard at that one. "BEVERLY HILLS, CA -- An estimated 150 million people continued to be without social lives Tuesday as a massive system failure at MySpace.com entered its third day."

Fantastic humor but perhaps also a scary harbinger of things to come... could it be true? Why not?

How to Tell Fake Phishing E-Mails from Real Ones

There is a very easy way to tell a fake phishing e-mail from a real one.

One immediate clue is to receive it from a bank where you have no account. That one is obvious (you would think) but still you'd be amazed how many people take such mails seriously despite the fact that they know they don't have an account at the said institution.

More importantly:

Such e-mails ALWAYS include a web URL link that they want you to click and visit to "update your critical security information" etc.

BEFORE clicking it, HOVER your cursor on the link and then look at the STATUS BAR at the bottom of your browser window to see the REAL ADDRESS that the link is pointing to.

If that address has nothing to do with the real-looking URL in the letter, then you can rest assured that you are the target of a phishing expedition that could drain your bank account before you know what.

Most of the time, such real addresses will have foreign country suffixes at the end since they are usually sent by scam artists from other countries. That would be a dead giveaway as well.

Remember: the e-mail address from where the e-mail seems to be originating from means NOTHING since it can easily be faked. Once I even received a scam mail from MY OWN E-MAIL ADDRESS! Wow... the scam operators really went overboard with that one without being aware of it.

The URL typed inside the body of the mail also means nothing because it is just plain text.

But the real web address to which that text is linked - that cannot be faked that easily.

Just hover your cursor over any link that you suspect and find out the real address the link is pointing at. That can save you a lot of unnecessary headache.

High Cost of Bad Information Design!

Poorly designed fax sheet causes police to evacuate more than a dozen businesses in Massachusetts!



This faxed page released by the Ashland Police Dept., shows a fax as it was to appear as a promotion sent by a marketing group Wednesday, May 30, 2007, to a Bank of America branch in Ashland, Mass.

A faulty fax arrived at the Bank of America's Ashland office Tuesday night omitting portions of the fax.

A bank employee misinterpreted the message Wednesday as a bomb threat causing authorities to evacuate more than a dozen neighboring businesses. (AP Photo/Ashland Police Dept.)

FrameMaker Tip – How to Set Up Your INDEX page numbers correctly

FrameMaker, like all powerful tools, can be frustrating if you do not know how to use it properly.

For example, FM has one of the most reliable and versatile book indexing functionalities under the sun. But setting it right might require paying attention to what’s going on in the Reference Pages and one particular paragraph tag within that page.

If you think your Index page numbers do not look right, do the following:

1) Go to your Reference Pages by selecting View > Reference Pages from your main menu.

2) In there, make a search for the Index tags by pressing Ctrl + G to display the GO TO PAGE dialog box.

3) From the Reference Page drop-down list, select “IX” and click the GO button.

4) Once you are in the Index reference page, find the building block(s) with the paragraph tag “IndexIX”. This step is very important. Just place your cursor on the building block(s) and read the corresponding paragraph tag in the status bar, at the bottom of your screen.

If there are no building blocks in the Index reference page with the IndexIX tag, you will not have any page numbers showing up in your Index.

If that is the case, type in <$pagenum>. Launch your Paragraph Designer and assign the IndexIX tag to that building block. That will display your Index page numbers.

If you have just <$pagenum>, your Index entries will be followed only by plain page numbers.

If you would like to have chapter numbers precede the page numbers, then you need to add another building block before the page number building block:

<$chapnum>-<$pagenum>

If you want your Index page numbers in bold and red (let's say), select all the IndexIX blocks, launch your Paragraph Designer, and make the necessary font changes. Apply the changes and you are done.

Note: For all such changes to take effect, you need to save the Reference Pages, go back to your Body Page view, and update your book index.

You Said "Testimonials"? Here are some!

Rare is a microsite which really hits the ball out of the ballpark with testimonials so many and so good that they almost sell the product by themselves.

Here is one such microsite that should be studied by all copywriters and marketers as to how the testimonials should be handled:

http://www.losethebackpain.com/backpainreliefguide.html

1) There are so many testimonials on this web site that you cannot even count. You end up saying "I'll be darn - even if only half of them are telling the truth it still is amazing!"

2) Almost all of them are accompanied by real names, real towns, and PHOTOS of real people. Very effective. The fact that some of them are riding horses or in sports gear earns EXTRA BONUS POINTS since this is a site about getting rid of back pain.

3) There are quite a few sound files, ready for you to listen. Now you decide ALL of the testimonials must be true.

Also note how they are offset from the main body text with a light green screen. It is important to visually differentiate the testimonials from the rest of the text for easy reading.

By the time you reach the end of the page you KNOW that this product works, definitely.

Three Masters of Copy who are not “Copywriters”

“Copy” simply means prose, and good copy is any piece of text that communicates well.

There are many master writers who turn out exquisite pieces of copy who are not “copywriters” since they do not write direct sales copy. But they still sell, albeit indirectly, the products, personalities and services that they so skillfully review.

Since they are so good with the words, you also don’t want to be around them when they don’t like your product or service. Their mighty sword uplifts and reflects light on their favorite objects. But the same instrument can also cut and dissect like a laser beam.

Here are the three non-copywriter masters of the copy that I read regularly:

1) Frank Deford is an award winning sports author with fifteen books, a Senior Contributing Writer at Sports Illustrated and a commentator on NPR.

Here are some Deford samples:

“Clemens, the best pitcher of this era, engages in an annual peek-a-boo. He retires in autumn, and then, like a perennial, decides to bloom again in the spring.”

“More often, though, there is the likes of Terrell Owens, diagnosed with modesty deficiency syndrome…”

“For many athletes, New York City is an intimidating place to play. Fans have high expectations and aren't afraid to boo players who disappoint them. If you can take it there, you can take it anywhere.”

For more: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4499275

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2) Rex Reed is a movie critic at New York Oberver.

Here are some samples from Reed:

“…Mr. Fraser as Jamie, a frustrated, simmering wimp with a streak of mendacity waiting to surface and torch…”

“…director Rydell balances every move on the head of a pin…”

“Jane Fonda can do just about anything, but first you have to give her something to do.”

“This movie is so bad people are taking bets to see how long they can stay awake without snoring.”

“Directed by Marc Evans, Snow Cake suffers from the same faults that plague most Canadian films: It drones itself to death with the pace of a drunken ant, and the ending takes longer than to arrive than Christmas morning.”

For more: http://www.observer.com/culture_rexreed.asp

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3) Warren Brown is an automobile reviewer at The Washington Post.

Here are some Brown samples:

“If pickup trucks were a religion, most of the owners of those vehicles in Asheville would be fundamentalists.”

“Witness the all-wheel-drive 2006 Infiniti M35 X sedan, a motorized treaty between excess and practicality.”

“…finished with elegant rosewood for older, more traditional customers who know that life's bits and bytes are relatively meaningless without its poetry.”

“Sitting in the car is akin to fitting one's body into a rich, comfortable glove. It is a rare instance in which status plays second fiddle to seduction.”

“Head-turning quotient: Oh, Bess! Honey, you snapped necks everywhere with your bad self…”

“I much prefer dancing -- spending an evening with salsa, samba or tango. There is just as much sweat in such movement; but the experience is more enjoyable, memorable -- like driving a DB9 along a beach road in Coronado at twilight.”

For more: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/business/columns/autos/brownwarren/

SCAMGLISH Gives Away E-Mail Scams

If you are not sure if an e-mail offer is a scam or not, just look at the English with which it is written.

Almost all scam letters have ungrammatical, awkward, stilted and sometimes outright laughable English (or, "Scamglish") since the text is copied and pasted many times over during the life cycle of the scam, without hardly any proofreading or anybody taking the time to make sure it is a grammatically correct letter. I doubt if some of them can even write or speak standard English.

Scam artists do not have the time for such niceties, thanks goodness. Otherwise how would we immediately recognize them?

Here are some recent gems that ended up in my mail box today... Enjoy!

---------------------------------

“You would be paid $450 every two weeks to a total of $900 per month.”

“Commission: 10% of every money order/check that is cashed instantly "cash in hand"
or "cash on counter" is what you get from the total cashed amount.”

“…our company supports any fees.”

“Thank You for taking your time to read our offer.”

“…we do not have a payment receiving personnel in these Areas.”

“I am very happy to inform you about my success in getting those funds transferred…”

“Furnish him with your informations like; Your full name.............”